Saturday, May 24, 2008

Small Success

Thursday I would have to say I had one of the most succesful days I've had in quite some time. First, I went to the Dr. for a follow-up on my meds (more on that later), then I took my 2 yr old grocery shopping. I worked on getting the house clean for my 9 yr. olds birthday party on Fri. And then made dinner while my husband was at a meeting. And I can only say that those are all things I have been unable to do for a long long time. And to do more than one in one day is pretty unheard of. So I felt pretty good about that.

As a stay-at-home mom, I know these are things that most would assume I take care of every day. But I really have not been able to accomplish much of anything for awhile. I have felt incredibly guilty that my husband has had to take over and pick up the slack in so many areas of our family life. And I am incredibly grateful that he has been willing and able to do so (he's always been a better cook than I am anyway). But since I am home, it seems that it makes more sense that I should do more. And I hope I will be able to do more, more frequently, soon. I hope I can pull my fair share again. And be able to feel competant and not so overwhelmed that I shut down and hide away. I want to be able to feel completely "engaged" in my life and not have to just "cope" quite so much. I hope I can get better and stay better. I really hope.

(is it even possible?)

1 comment:

Aqua said...

Hi deepblue,
I saw you left a message on my blog and came over to say hello. This post reminds me so much of me...in fact I will probably right a similar post on my blog as my husband and I are having a great deal of problems with my lack of ability to contribute to the household chores. I find it even difficult to make dinner anymore, and I'm supposedly feeling better than I was.

I get the struggle, but am sorry to see you are struggling too.
...aqua